A surgeon retires from his long career as a specialist in circumcision.
Throughout his career, he has saved hundreds of foreskins as mementos and now wishes to turn them into a souvenir.
He takes his specimens to a leathersmith and asks him to make something out of them.
A week later the surgeon...
An old bloke hires a hitman to kill his wife of 40 years.
The hitman says, "I'll shoot her just below her left tit."
The husband replies, "I want her dead not fucking kneecapped!"
Took the car for a cruise round Chesterfield today (my home town) and down the towns bypass.It'll give you a flavour of where I live.
Yes that is a bug splattered on the windscreen in the second half of the video.I know some of you will be appalled as it's not factory correct,but I like it so...
Found this,thought it might be worth making a Sticky due to the number of people asking for wheel and tire size.
http://www.buicks.net/shop/reference/tires.html#chart
I've tried different chrome cleaners and plenty of elbow grease on the rear bumper but this one piece always looks like this.It's not scratched at all but has a dull finish.The rest gleams like new and is in great shape.Is there a way to improve it?
Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money.
Between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro.
Murphy said "Hang on, I have an idea."
He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage.
Shamus said "Are you crazy...
The phone rings, and the wife answers.
A pervert, breathing heavily, says, "I bet you have a tight ass with no hair."
Woman replies, "Yes I do, he's watching TV - whom shall I say is calling?"
A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago.
"Red meat is awful. Soft drinks erode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none...
A man is sitting on a train across from a busty blonde wearing a tiny mini skirt. Despite his efforts, he is unable to stop staring at the top of her thighs. To his delight, he realizes she has gone without underwear. The blonde realizes he is staring and inquires, "Are you looking at my pussy"...
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